Randomness is a must.

everyoneisdeadnow:

if we go to a restaurant and have to choose between a table or a booth and you say table i will never trust you again

(via a-corable)

Notes
522634
Posted
1 hour ago

This fucked me up (via obsessiveloserr)

fuck.

(via giveit-time)

(via el-ph-nts)

you chug a fifth of alcohol by yourself & everyone around you is too busy cheering to wonder how empty you had to be in order to do it
Notes
33879
Posted
1 hour ago

Rudy Francisco, Your God (via cloudyskiesandcatharsis)

(via liquidmeth)

To the man standing on the corner holding the sign that said
“God hates faggots.”

I’ve never seen,
exactly
who it is that you paperclip your knees,
meld your hands together and pray to
But I think I know what he looks like:

I bet your God is about 5’10”.
I bet he weighs 185.
Probably stands the way a high school diploma does when it’s next to a GED.
I bet your god has a mullet.
I bet he wears flannel shirts with no sleeves,
a fanny pack
and says words like “getrdun.”
I bet your god—I bet your god—I bet your god watches FOX news,
Dog the Bounty Hunter, voted for John McCain, and loves Bill O’Reilly.
I bet your god lives in Arizona.

I bet his high school served racism in the cafeteria
and offered “hate speech” as a second language.
I bet he has a swastika inside of his throat,
and racial slurs tattooed to his tongue
just to make intolerance more comfortable in his mouth.
I bet he has a burning cross as a middle finger and Jim Crow underneath his nails.

Your god is a confederate flags wet dream
conceived on a day when the sky decided to slice her own wrists,
I bet your god has a drinking problem.
I bet he sees the bottom of the shot glass more often than his own children.
I bet he pours whiskey on his dreams until they taste like good ideas,

Probably cusses like an electric guitar with Tourette’s plugged into an ocean.
I bet he yells like a schizophrenic nail gun,
damaging all things that care about him enough to get close.

I bet there are angels in Heaven with black eyes and broken halos
who claimed they fell down the stairs.

I bet your god would’ve made Eve without a mouth
and taught her how to spread her legs like a magazine
that she will never ever ever be pretty enough to be in.

Sooner or later you will realize that you are praying to your own shadow,
that you are standing in front of mirrors and are worshipping your own reflection.
Your God stole my god’s identity and I bet he’s buying pieces of heaven on eBay.

So next time you bend your knees,
next time you bow your head
I want you to
tell your god—
that my god
is looking for him.

Notes
5309
Posted
1 day ago

jakemalik:

the amount of pictures I would take if I had a hot body is unimaginable 

(via lubricates)

Notes
460620
Posted
1 day ago

ionlyfollowbadblogs:

when you send a snapchat to the wrong person
image

(via yelled)

Notes
89074
Posted
1 day ago
can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

why is there a huge jug of oregano??? who the fuck puts oregano in brownies?????

i have been informed that it is not oregano but is in fact marijuana

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

why is there a huge jug of oregano??? who the fuck puts oregano in brownies?????

i have been informed that it is not oregano but is in fact marijuana

(via yelled)

Notes
519354
Posted
1 day ago

WHEN ONE IS EXPECTING

maliciaous:

imyourdestinymotherfucker:

Today, I bought this book (for my sister, lets clarify that now ‘cause the only way I’m going anywhere near sperm is if I fall into a vat of it):

image

BUT WAIT

THIS:

image

IS:

image

SOME:

image

OF THE BRILLIANT:

image

STUFF IT HAS IN IT:

image

WHAT THE HELL

(via guy)

Notes
136079
Posted
1 day ago

adventuretimeandsuperjailrock:

If this isn’t good marketing I literally don’t want to know what is.

(via ruinedchildhood)

Notes
93591
Posted
2 days ago
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